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The persistent belief is that women are looking for long-term committed relationship and men are looking for short-term sexual relationships.
Being scarred by prior disappointments in guys who cheated on them, many women are unable to enjoy their present relationship, even when everything seems to be great, because of that constant fear that sooner or later their boyfriend, or a husband will cheat on them, just like the others did in the past.Those women’s beauty was “neutralized” by their incompetence or their behavior during intimacy that chilled romance, or by their being boring in bed and not offering a sexual experience that’s “spicy” enough to keep the guy’s interest in the long run.Just like a woman who was bored on a date is not going to return that guy’s call or text, the guy who has been bored with his girlfriend or a wife in bed is going to start looking for an adventure an excitement on a side.A recent study looked into why older women — in this case, women in their 60s and 70s — date. Some had lost satisfying relationships because the men wanted to get married but the women didn’t, sometimes because it would hurt them financially and sometimes because they didn’t want to have to care for anyone else anymore.A few things became clear to the researchers early on — the women treasured their independence and craved companionship. In fact, many said they were not interesting in caretaking ever again — they’d been there and done that.Because men have shorter lifespans, many older men are interested in having a potential caregiver or a “nurse with a purse.” They tend to marry quicker than older women, but it isn’t because older women can’t find a hubby; it’s because women are more likely to be looking for a short-term relationship or a companion, not a husband.
That isn’t true for my three girlfriends, but it’s true for me.Nothing will replace the excitement of, and the satisfaction from, having new experiences with new female partners, and it would be pointless to try to change such a guy.This desire for novelty and variety of dating and sexual partners is particularly strong among divorced men who come out of a long (unhappy / sexless) marriage.They desired companionship and a social life — and sex.But they were not willing to compromise on losing their sense of freedom, to the point that they were “willing to be lonely before sacrificing independence.” I don’t want to be alone or lose my freedom — is it possible to have both without having to become a wife again? She believes — and I agree — that more people need to talk openly about this because all older women hear (and thus believe) is that older men are them from the 50-something dating pool ASAP; I’m not interested in men like that so move along, men, and good luck! As a newly single woman after an eight-plus year relationship, I am curious about what to expect this time, now that I’m 50-something instead of 40-something.